Incomplete Life

by Tara   Apr 14, 2007


He chats and laughs at the dinner table
passing the food around to all
such innocence in these acts
no ditch to slip and fall

But there is another life
a dreadful one full of sick lies and pain
He dwells on things of the past
And drinks until near insane

Narcotics are an easy way out
He enjoys the numb pleasure
Hides the remnants
Carefully handling his treasure

Turns on the computer
Searches for a vulgar flick
eyes glued to the bright screen
his actions are nothing less than sick

How do you help him
no medicine that will treat
without his sick pleasures
his life is incomplete

Try to ignore the perversion
is there any other solution?
to pray over his soul
Is the only resolution

By: Tara -April 14.07

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by Espoirfailed

    No don't put a comma in between sick, lies. i'm giessing you mean lies that are sick. not vomit and lies EWW. *btw i'm referring to above comment.

    i think this poem flowed well and was well thought out and penned. xx

  • 17 years ago

    by Startle Me

    I read this poem twice.
    I only found one thing wrong in it.
    ECK!
    I used to be rough on poems.
    But now I'm getting soft.
    Sorry.
    But still
    a dreadful life full of sick lies and pain
    you should put commas in there.
    Sick, lies, and pain.
    It just doesn't flow well without it.
    Otherwise
    5/5?

  • 17 years ago

    by Tricky Daze

    So true and sad...this kinda guys are so spread out in our world..the flow was perfect..but in just a line something broke it

    But there is another life
    a dreadful life full of sick lies and pain: In the second line if you use something different than 'life',it would be better
    My suggestion:A dreadful one that full of lies and pain

    Other than that,i really liked it
    Keep it up
    Have a nice day
    Laura

  • 17 years ago

    by Verdada

    Fantasic description tara! REALLY awesome how it seems like a short story but form nicely in poem form love it keep it up girl!
    Much love,

    Verdada

  • 17 years ago

    by Simply Josh

    Great job Tara. It gave a very vivid image of him and I enjoyed reading it. Keep it up.
    cheers, josh

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