Trying to survive

by ~*SugarCube*~   Apr 14, 2007


So much heart ache she's always felt
because of that man.
With every painful welt
He leaves on her skin.

Yelling & screaming
telling her she should be more thin.
Criticizing her every move
telling her she needs to improve

She's not allowed to leave the house.
"You follow my rules
I own you, you're my spouse"

She can't get away.
It's a struggle to get through
every dreadful day.

A Ferocious beating
She receives every night.
In the basement she lies
wanting to break free

she's left alone with bruises, aching wounds
and agonizing pain.
The man she once loved has turned insane.

So many tears she shed
her eyes extremely red.
she reaches out to god.
hoping he'll hear her prayers.
hoping that he, will be one that cares.

She doesn't know how much longer
she can survive.
She never knows how much longer she'll be alive.

*Chelsea*

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by Brigitte

    Another VERY unique topic accompanied by unique discriptive words. The flow wasn't exactly perfect and some sentances didn't seem to fit the poem. I sugest capatalizing the first letter of a word used after a period.

    So much heart ache she's always felt
    because of that man.
    With every painful welt
    He leaves on her skin.
    ^^^Somthing didn't work there.... I'm not sure what but it was on the third and forth sentance.

  • 17 years ago

    by stefanie

    The flow was a bit off but overall a good and meaningful but sad poem. keep it up. your a great writer.

  • 17 years ago

    by BeautifulxMess

    Yeah, the flow was rocky on this poem. I didn't quite catch a rhythem. A lot of grammar errors I found. Overall, I did like it. It was a sad and told a terrible story. Unfortunatly the poem was good, not great. God Bless 4/5<-Sorry.
    <3Tayyy

  • 17 years ago

    by lexie

    Wow,this was soo powerful.if this is a real life story,please seek help.i watched my mom go through 3 abusive relationships,its one of the most painful things to have happen.
    also,maybe ask god for strenght to go on instead of just straight up helping you.thats what i do when i'm down.
    thanks again for commenting.
    beautiful poem!
    --lexie

  • 17 years ago

    by MaSkEdSoUl

    Thats so sad. Alot of emotion and great vocab except:

    "She's not aloud to leave the house."

    I dont think aloud is the word you want to use. Its allowed. Other than that it was well written. Keep it up!!

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