Beth

by TamborineMan   Apr 16, 2007


Five months have passed
still I cannot sleep
exchange a month for a year
how long will I retreat

I must find a way to manage
yet it's difficult to conceal the pain
feign a happy disposition
to avoid worried questions

if I don't flash a smile
their concerns resurface
inject false happiness
to shadow my grief

my body dutifully follows
the daily routines it knows
deceitful content cuts deeply
festering now familiar wounds

my friends and family
are pleased that I am mending
broken smiles and fractured laughs
withdraw from my wearied frame

but in truth there is no relief
so I descend like the sun into sleep
in my dreams I can't escape her
in my mind she persecutes me

unwillingly, I close my eyes
as her open arms beckon to me
all that I want she offers
so in joyful tears I embrace

with her return I feel whole.
her smell invigorates me,
and her touch warms my blood.
her smile hints at a happy life together

but the vicious cycle breaks
and violently I wake from the dream
my heart withers away
as her rejection, I must relive once more

slave to my own sorrow,
each day I brace for the night
never does it fail nor lessen
I've lost hope in myself

five months have passed
hollow life I leave aside
every morning I lose her again
no hope left but suicide

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by StandStill

    Beautiful poem. expressed your feelings amazingly. very raw and genuine. and there is always another answer. <3

  • 17 years ago

    by Mr M

    I thought this was well written. It flowed nicely and left me with the type of impression I look for at the end of some of the stanzas...a good taste in my mouth. I noted some small bit of word usage but not enough to distract from the poem. I mention it as I told you I would.

    If I had written this poem, I word keep the thoughts and feelings intact except for where I would polish it a bit to convey more deeply what I'm feeling.

  • 17 years ago

    by sweet_rebellion

    Wow. this poem is so raw and emotional. I feel so sorry for the way you feel. I have felt that way before. All I did was dream of the life and love I used to have then wake up to the reality so afraid of another rejection, so afraid to trust another the way i gave my life to my first love. But all we need to do is put one foot in front of another and soon your heart will mend together again and soon you can reach to others for love you thought you would never beable to gie or recieve again. I hope things work out for you!

    great poem all in all though!

    sweet_rebellion

  • 17 years ago

    by Goran Rahim

    Wow, i couldnt find anything wrong with this poem, so perfectly written, it is my first time reading a poem by you and i think you are one of the greatest one.........
    thank you very much for the advices on my poem, it was very helpful

    keep up the great job

  • 17 years ago

    by Sole

    Wow. I thought this poem was amazing. I'm afraid to say I don't have the critique skills you possess, and so my comments will be no comparison. However, I don't feel that this poem could be improved upon, as it truly is a great write.

    'broken smiles and fractured laughs'

    I loved this line, and it's stanza, it just felt right, as though the lines connected perfectly. Once again, a truly well written piece of poetry.

    Take Care - Sole.

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