To The Love I Want Ever So Badly

I want to be yours
Just you and I
Together until the end of time
But my life is just a lie

I lie to myself
About what I feel about you
I know I love you
But I just cant hear were through

I am scared to lose my first
I dont want to leave him
And Im scared youll leave me too
I am hanging on a limb

I want to be with you
But I am scared of the outcome
I am so scared your going to leave
What am I to become?

Am I to be your wife?
Or do I not mean anything at all
I just feel so alone
I just want to fall

Fall until I can no more
Just fall into the dark
Where no one can hurt me no more
Because on my heart there is a mark

I have no more patience
I can no longer deal with this pain
No one really cares
Theres nothing to gain

I just want to go away
And cry until I cant no more
Because no one here notices anyway
My heart has grown sore

I just want to leave this place
And go somewhere with just you and I
This way no one can bother us
And then I wont have to cry

Because then my choice will be made
I will have you and only you
Happiness is so hard to find
And I found it by saying were through

I love you so much
From the bottom of my broken heart
I want to be with you so bad
Forever until the very start

I am listening to our song.
Or at least a song that sends me to the past
It hurts so much that I cant cry
And I don't want it to last

Please heal me
Please tell me you love me; you want me
Please show me the happiness I need
The smile that sets me free

To know you love me
Makes me feel so incredible
Like I can do anything
But I am so gullible

So do you love me babe
If so please let me know
And show me that smile
And your love will show

I love you hunnie
How many times do I have to say it?
I love you Zach..
That seems to fit

Please dont give up on me
And know that I am always thinking of you
So babe please dont make me upset
And never say were through

CLH
9/19/06

This poem was to my ex-boyfriend Zach. I was with him for four years and I just decided that our relationship couldnt drag out any longer. I am so happy now and so much stress free. I will always love him, but our relationship can be no more.