On the Days it Rains

by Lu   Apr 22, 2007


R.T.V.W Club challenge :
Write a poem about what you see when looking
out your window where you live..
OCD = Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder

Looking through the glass of the window
agitated by the smear marks
another may not notice the smudges
unless you have OCD that is

Hearing the rain thumping on the roof
blasted tin roof, days like today
the raindrops race frantically down the glass
masking my tears from any, outside viewers

Thump 1, thump 2, thump 3, thump 4
10 thumps and I could start over
ten is a lucky number, nice and even
maybe, nothing bad would happen today

Outside the trees looked so sad
drooping under the weight of the heavy rain
a few cracks of thunder rumble
the sky turns a greyish - black

Oh Lord I hope he is ok in this weather
ten squirts of windex, blasted smudges
ten sheets of paper towel and ten wipes
please make it stop raining, so I know he's safe

Sky begins to clear and the rain slows to a trickle
beautiful rainbow appears in the distance
phone rings, ten rings to be exact, he knows me well
he always calls after a thunderstorm, darling

Yes I am fine thank-you, are you alright
"I'll be home soon, I love you " he says
"love you too" I whisper as I replace the phone
touching it ten times exactly, it's the rule

I must be sure he is ok ... on the days it rains

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by katie!

    Luanne, this is fantastic, I really got sucked into the poem and the main character.

    I thought you described it really well and your use of words was great, it had a dead good flow as well

    All in all, wonderful, I really enjoyed reading this, well done indeed, well done!!

    LOVE
    Katie!
    XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

  • 17 years ago

    by Gem

    I know someone with this diagnosis and the freaky thing is, she has a thing with the number ten as well!
    Your poem explained it so well Lu, it was so hard hittingly spot on!
    Yet it portayed the other side as well, the side of caring that comes with it.
    Excellently done, i have yet to do this challenge. There's nothing out my window to write about, lol
    5/5
    *Gem*

  • 17 years ago

    by Chelsey

    Luanne I love hearing about people with OCD...I wish there was a job dealing with people who have this disorder..is there? Because its so interesting to me ...I hope that doesn't make it wrong on my part, but I just find it interesting...why haven't I ever wrote about it?!!..

    I loved what you did with the idea for the challenge.....that last line by the way....Brilliant!! It sounds like a song! "Must make sure hes ok, on the day that it rains"...o0o0o it kinda inspires me to write something!
    Anyways jumping off subject like we do haha...I loved this poem Luanne, your description were done to a T....I loved it!

  • 17 years ago

    by Cindy

    Luanne
    This is a very diffrent poem. I love it :) Brings to light somethings we don't often think about.

    Oh Lord I hope he is ok in this weather
    ten squirts of windex, blasted smudges
    ten sheets of paper towel and ten wipes
    please make it stop raining, so I know he's safe

    I really liked this stanza. Excellent job!
    Take Care Love Cindy

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