I want to... but i cant

I want to stop this insanity
The thoughts that rise
And disappear
They stay locked up
Within my mind

I want to leave the blade behind
To stop the blood
From leaving my veins
The feeling that I get
With every slice of skin

I want to forget the past
And live a life
Without remembering
The stupid shit
That brought me down

I want to but I cant
Trapped behind bars
Surrounded by insanity
Where the blade slices
And I cant forget