Feelings

Sometimes I lie awake,
Wondering what did I do wrong
But never what you did wrong
You always blame me,
You keep trying to change me,
But have you ever thought,
I`m not a puppet in your hands
I`m not an object.
I try not to think of,
I try not to mind
But it hurts like hell
Feeling that I can`t stand up to this
But feeling that I can`t walk away
Have you ever wondered,
You`re a mystery to me
You`re like a drug
Can`t live with you
Can`t live without you
And I still find peace
And I still find confort
And I still find trust
And I still find shelter
In you
Sometimes I feel you don`t care,
Sometimes I feel you`re everything I have
Sometimes I feel you so close,
But sometimes I feel you gone
I wish I didn`t care,
I wish I could stop bothering,
I wish I was to dumb to notice
The fun you find in every pain I share
Your smile hurts my eye,
Your laughter makes me wanna cry,
Your hugs make me wanna run away,
You torn me into piesces,
With one word..
I crumble at your feets..
When will you realise
Your love is killing me
Your presence is driving me away
With every breath I take
With every word I say
With every struggle
I make to keep you close
You grow apart
The more I try
The more I lose
The more I love
The more I get hurt
The more I confess
I hide the real me
I don`t even know who I am
Is this me or is this
Who you want me to be
I always thought I`m strong
But in your hands I melt
Wish I could wake up one morning
Knowing what you feel
Knowing what to do
Knowing something about you
You`re a mistery
A mistery that I won`t ever solve
You poison me while you cure me
You hurt me while loving me
You`re pulling me closer while driving me away
You`re killing me while helping me
You lose me while making me love you more
I hate you while dying without you..