Personally Public

To tired am I,
to write a poem with meaning,
so instead I'll write,
about what I'm feeling.

I'm tired and selfish,
my chest just caved in,
the knife in my room,
it will not win.

To desperate I am now,
with a smile on my face,
the person I've created,
can't be erased.

Supposedly I'm now two characters,
one who laughs, cheats and cries,
his name is *blank* pangilinan,
don't trust him,
he lies.

The second person I've become is,
one who laughs, cheats and cries,
his name is *blank* pangilinan,
don't trust him,
he lies.

exhausted by the repeat in steps,
he slowly stops the pain,
the pain now rushes through his body,
washed away by the rain.

This rain that falls from the city,
are "heys" and "are you okay's?"
swear I didn't think I'd write an emo poem,
how stupid,
what am I gay?

I'll look right up right after the fight,
not hiding from defeat,
just taking all the blows and stabs,
*BLANK* TAKE THE HEAT,

Instead of a life dead, filled with denial,
I'll stand back up,
and put on a smile.

For all of you guys,
I care for your sake,
for now,
JUST for now,
my smile will be fake.