Reason behind this

We've been best friends since i was thirteen.
Stuck at the hip, nobody came between.

The days kept coming and going so fast
I tried so hard to make them last.

When we were young and life was grand
talking about the lives we had planned

Then it came the big one-four
Seems like the year flew right out the door

this was the year the family decided to move
no computer, a friendship to prove.

i had finally got my cell and gave her a call
so we had made a plan, to meet at the mall

i was so happy, things were great
Out exciting plans, i couldn't wait!

Then it came, the year we turned fifteen
We were closer than anybody's ever seen

I started a new school, met new friends
but a friendship like ours never ends.

Sweet sixteen, its finally here
This is gonna be our year

Our friendship was at an all time high
we'd talk everyday, not letting one slip by..

we met up again, this time at your place
so much happiness in such a little space

I never wanted to leave that day
I hoped and prayed i could just stay

But reality set, and the next day i had to go
So i told you i love you more than you'll ever know

Seventeen was the year it went down hill
All our little fights began to make me ill.

We both made mistakes, but i made more than you
Our friendship began to crumble, i had no clue what to do

Little fights came and little fights past
But it was always the big ones to last

I cant stand the fact you said all that to me
I'm so hurt and dying inside cant you see

I never knew id ever be thinking this way
Should i leave, or should i just stay.

I start out slow, not making my decision yet
Hoping i wont do anything i regret.

But then i reach and grab the knife
Not completely ready to end my life.

I carve in my wrist the word "devin"
So everyone knows, why I'm here in heaven.

Everyone will know when they see my wrist
My reason behind doing all of this.