Comments : Discarded Damsel

  • 17 years ago

    by S0u10fS0rr0w

    I can tell u one thing debbie cakes, your poems are absolutely excellent, your choice of wording is wonderful, love this one, its a 5/5 as always!!! keep them coming!!!

  • Wow, I love this.
    Your word choice was amazing and the flow was flawless.
    The emotion was shown.
    Keep it up 5/5

    [Sarah]

  • 17 years ago

    by Wallace

    Excellent poem, the vocabulary was amazing, keep it up.

  • 17 years ago

    by Cindy

    Debbie
    Great job! I can invision this very sad. Word choices exccellent.

    Wincing, as he warded me off~
    ...like chaffs driven away
    by the gnashing wind...

    These lines are great. Reminds me of someone trying to make an pesky child go away. Great job.
    Take care Cidny

  • 17 years ago

    by debbylyn

    How sad....rebuffed by a lover....I love the line..

    "(Fire gone gray in his ardent heart)"...leads me to believe this must be someone who used to share in those feelings of love.

    "...like chaffs driven away
    by the gnashing wind..."

    Discarded love soon to be forgotten....memories dashed and discarded...my take anyway....

    Interesting and sad....well done as always...All the best, Debbie

  • 17 years ago

    by Melpomene

    This was a beautifully sad written poem you have here debbs. I enjoyed it all and found it to be quite interesting. Your vocab never stops to amaze me. Well done on a nicely written short poem. Loved it ~mel

  • 17 years ago

    by Gem

    "...like chaffs driven away
    by the gnashing wind..."

    I loved that similie, i kind of interpreted it a love gone sour... i may be wrong and i'm going to take a bit more time to dwell on this one as well.
    Excellent vocab m'dear!
    5/5
    *Gem*

  • 17 years ago

    by Sourav

    This is a real good poem. Short and so effective... Great write!

  • 17 years ago

    by Brianna

    I like this poem evn tho its kinda hard 2 interpret...i love the line "fire gone gray in his ardent heart". i can totally imagine it. you worded this poem so well. well keep writing! don't let the writer's block get 2 u!

  • 17 years ago

    by IdTakeABulletForYou

    *Sigh*

    Now what the hell does this poem mean? Lol, I'm not really sure. I'm trying to figure it out.

    #1- The words did seem a little show-offy m'dear.

    #2- Despite show-offyness m'dear, the words were in some sense, effective.

    Well done though, despite the oblivion I am in to the meaning.

    5/5
    ~Stephen White

  • 17 years ago

    by Debbie

    ^You amuse me with your ignorance, m'dear.

  • 17 years ago

    by Silently He walks

    =/ im not to familiar with that vocabulary. I will rate this and give it a proper comment once I really understand what you have here...

  • 17 years ago

    by Ben

    Loved the poem, 5/5 keep it up.

  • 17 years ago

    by Vanessa

    Applause* That was amazing, I loved the vocab it added such power, for such a short poem. Excellent job well done. 5/5

  • 17 years ago

    by Daisy if you do

    I suppose I took this alot differently than every one else. I took this as a story of a battle between good and evil. A story of the devil awaiting his next victim only to have come upon the death of a angel. I love the way it can be taken many ways. I agree after reading other comments that it can be taken as love shunned, but my first opinion was that of the afterlife. The write held me and I was mesmerized by the strong vocabulary in this piece. You have done a wonderful job with the imagery and the flow. Great Job 5/5

    Dixie

  • 17 years ago

    by Falling Again

    Amazing(i do believe i spelled that wrong), I love poems where they are left open and to the reader to interpret. Great work

  • 17 years ago

    by gabriella

    You are sduch a talented girl i love your poems, it is funny you live on the other side of the world but i know alot about philipians casue i jsut took a test on it. keep writting 5/5 you are such an inspiration

  • 17 years ago

    by Karl Wild GG23

    This is a very strong write with excellent word choices. Although it is short it is filled with so much pain and sadness. "fire gone grey in his ardent heart" best line of the poem. Excellent job 5/5

  • 17 years ago

    by dollwithafrown

    Haha, I read that somebody said the words were "show-offy". I don't think you're trying to show off at all. Just because that person doesn't understand the words, lol.

    Anyway, I interpreted this to be the love between two people has now changed, gone sour, even, and is no longer what it once was?

    Your vocab usage is, as always, wonderful. Keep it up.

  • 17 years ago

    by Jenni Marie

    I interpreted this as love gone wrong...not sure if I'm right lol
    I loved the imagery you used in this, it was beautifully done, created very vivid pictures for the reader.
    Word choice was a joy to read, as was the whole poem.
    Flow is flawless throughout, and the ending to me, seemed very intense and sad.