Hey,
I like the similie you used in the first line of this poem. It makes the reader kinda see this image and helps undertsand what you meant better. Youve got this image metaphrically placedi n many parts of the poem for example; "it eats me alive slowly piece by piece" you can kinda imagine an owl eating its pray like this. It works really good. You had good usage of vocaburaly in this peace. You used repitition good at parts of the poem. I like the fact your using punctuation in your work. It really helps the reader read it the way you want it to be read. It seems as though its kinda recited in your own mind. The structure of this peace you need to work on a little bit though. Keep writing! xx