Your secret

This knowledge that I have
Seems more like a secret I'm keeping.
I desperately want to tell them,
Someone, anyone,
But I cannot
For it is not my secret to tell.
So instead I hold it inside me
As it gnaws at every thought
And festers agonisingly within.
The longer I keep it, the harder it becomes
And soon it will swallow every thought.
Already it plagues my waking hours
Filling me with worry and dread,
Catching me unawares in those stolen moments
And I drift, and gaze, and panic.
Can you not see it in my eyes?
Surely something that has wound me so tightly inside
Must have the slightest physical effect,
Can you not see it in my tears?

I nearly failed you yesterday,
I nearly came right out and said it.
But it was not the place,
It was not the time for me to betray you,
For although I long to scream it
I find myself mute,
Avoiding all words that may make me cry.
For although it is my secret,
That you never told me to keep,
I have no right to talk
About that which is yours to worry about.
And I will not cry for you
Not yet.