How To Succeed In Business Without Really Trying

by xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex   May 22, 2007


"If that's a cup holder, I'll take it!" you hastily stated as the sales in other places quickly fell.
You must be a diligent worker to know how to do things right and know exactly what to sell.
You know the product will soar higher than ever before, people just have to see how the cup holders worth,
Set it up right; plan long and well; to a new industry of cup holders you'll give birth.

Count down the days until your office opens; oh, how exciting it will be!
"And maybe," you consider, "I'll have an affair with the secretary."

You must brace yourself against the rush of the crowd; you must be ready when they realize cup holders are the new fad.
Sit quietly until you get the call; "Hello?" You answer to help, but find your first customer is your dad.

Grab the blankets and wrap them around you; they'll protect you as the industry comes to a stop;
You've got more than just business to lose; your enemy is rising to the top.

Whimper as you call the boss, embarrassed at your mistake, he answer and swears, "You're fired!"
You knew this was coming, but you didn't plan ahead; you used all your money and experienced required.

Now you sulk home to a disappointed wife who could keep [her] job from fraying,
You must realize, "How to succeed in business without really trying," is honestly a stupid saying.

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by HOLLYWOODxBANGBANG

    I LOVE this. The title drew me in immediately, reminded me of a title for a song by someone like Cute Is What We Aim For. :]

    "Count down the days until your office opens; oh, how exciting it will be!
    "And maybe," you consider, "I'll have an affair with the secretary." "

    ^^ I adored those lines, they made me smile but at the same time really showed off your talent.

    5.5
    :]
    <3

  • 17 years ago

    by dollwithafrown

    Very interesting idea, haha. Parts of this made me laugh out loud:

    'Count down the days until your office opens; oh, how exciting it will be!
    "And maybe," you consider, "I'll have an affair with the secretary."'

    and

    'You must brace yourself against the rush of the crowd; you must be ready when they realize cup holders are the new fad.
    Sit quietly until you get the call; "Hello?" You answer to help, but find your first customer is your dad.'

    ^ Those were great!

    Kudos to you for trying something different and making it work.

  • 17 years ago

    by Startle Me

    "If that's a cup holder, I'll take it!" you hastily stated as the sales in other places quickly fell.
    It was hard to find a flow in that one.
    It felt run on to me.
    Second stanza?
    Hillarious. Lol.
    Third stanza?
    Like I said, your flow was just... out?
    It felt really weird.
    Although you rhymed it, it was just different.
    Fourth stanza.
    The truth.
    Lol.
    Your flow was weird, but your grammar was perfect.
    Semi-colons, colons you had it all at the perfect spot.
    I bet this took a lot of hard work.
    5/5 dearest?

  • 17 years ago

    by Normal is the Watchword

    You could have added a bt more detail to support your lines but the information is actually a real keeper. THe ending line shows that it is indeed a stupid saying and that people still repeat the same mistakes as the c haracter in your writing. The line about the secretary though seemed like a quick line of well thought out humour.

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