A Reason to Believe

I have nothing to say to you,
There's nothing I can explain.
I'm choking on my useless guilt,
I'm up to the brim with shame.

And I still cry for no reason,
unable to wipe away the blood.
How did I turn into this?
Who is this stranger I've become?

I'm lost without a feeling,
so unsure of who to be.
Tell me why I should hold on,
give me a reason to believe.

I'm suffocated by my weakness,
I'm alive yet already dead.
So I stab the knife in my heart,
and I aim the gun to my head.