Unknown To The World

People say they understand my life,
But they have no clue.
I don't understand my own life.
Do they know what it's like to always expect someone to jump out and scream "BOO!"?

Do people know what I feel inside?
No, noone knows but me.
And to describe such emotions is difficult because I have tried.
To truely say they know me, they'd have to be me.

I try to escape the day to day life,
But my tries are useless, not even music helps.
I stare intensely but I know no one will help, no knife.
My pathetic cries turn into useless yelps.

Oddly enough no one hears, or cares.
But soon dawn will be upon me, then school.
I can't take this anymore it's too much for one to bare.
I'm such a fool!

Why bother trying who would possibly miss me?
If only people knew my pain,
If only there was someplace to flee.
I'm always on that emotional train.

If only I could start over, as someone pretty,
Someone smart,
I wish if not pretty then itty-bitty,
I dream of being pinned on a board and have something through my head,
A single dart.