Behind This Smile

You see a smile, that's not really there.
Look closer to see my tears.
I try so hard to bury the pain.
But you always know, when I'm not okay.
On the outside I'm happy and composed.
But inside I'm panicking and no one knows.
You believe everything is okay.
And that nothing can go wrong.
Look deeper to see I'm weak.
And that I was never strong.
Did I ask for this to take over me?
Please let me go, let me bleed.
I cry and cry until my tears freeze like stone.
I've lost my heart and you can't love me anymore.
Leave me to die, the way I was born, alone.
You hear a laugh concealing the scream.
You said you loved me, but you don't know what love means.
You ran when I needed you the most.
I took so many painkillers that I had an overdose.
My life is such a lie.
There is another me behind this smile.