Back in the day, as we'd often reflect,
the games we played and dreams we had
were so much simpler than how we're living now.
Did you ever dream of us changing like this,
growing this distant and for the worst?
We spent a lot of time pretending.
It was just us, a few years older,
still best friends and very believable.
We shared everything, as we were taught to do,
and the fights never lasted past an hour.
How did you become so selfish?
Why did the pretending have to end?
I remember all of our vacations with odd neighbors,
jokes with both our brothers, and all of your accidents.
The time you swallowed a penny
and the time you threw up in the pool.
When did you start hurting yourself on purpose?
The move was quick, maybe too fast for me.
The first time I ever shared a bedroom,
with the sister I always wanted, always had.
I looked up to you for so long and you
were one of the few people whose opinion mattered to me.
Why does our childhood together seem so short?
How did we advoid discussing anything real?
For a year we went to separate schools,
with different schedules and different friends.
Jealousy never overwhelmed me.
You've always cared too much about what others think.
How was I supposed to deal with this problem again?
I couldn't keep up with your antics
when I put life into perspective.
The day I realized my hesitation for love,
I discovered a reason for your illness.
But how many excuses do you need to build this wall?
When will you stop blaming your other people,
and make it your own responsibility?
Even the first time you lied to my face
that moment was too much for me.
I lost so much respect; I couldn't understand my oldest friend.
I've never seen so much deceitfulness behind your eyes.
When did I stop looking up and start looking down?
We haven't talked, and it's been about a month.
As the awkwardness grows the more I think.
I've learned about forgiving,
but you're not even sorry.
You're still so full of dishonesty and living in this attention.
Are you proud of what you've done?
Does your new friend pat you on the back?
If anything I believe I only have to be sorry for two things.
I'm sorry you can't help yourself.
And I'm sorry I haven't forgiven you yet.
If only you would confess and apologize,
but when would that be?
