Why am I here

by BreeAnna   Jun 7, 2007


I am trying to figure out
this little problem called reality
another teenager murdered today
one more fatality.

kids are dying for what reason
I ask myself all the time
I always complain about the little things
some people dont even have a dime

I believe strongly
that everyone has their reason for being here
and to add to my problem
i feel I am no more then what appears.

I believe I am here for a reason
maybe to make a difference in someones life
because its hard to accept
that the girl who was murdered will never be a wife.

I want to make a change
to a person a family a friend
maybe some day my feelings
will become a popular trend.

I am done writing this poem
and I hope you all will feel the same
lets put them all behind bars
the people who have made us feel shame.

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by sadeyes

    This poem really hit the nail on the head and so many people out there are dying and never will have love or families. Great poem
    Keep it up

  • 17 years ago

    by Brittany C

    I liked it. Cool poem. I think that you had chosen the right topic to write about. The flow was ok and the word choice was good. I gave it a 5/5.

  • 17 years ago

    by Georgi

    Hiya! i thought that this was a lovely poem, its obvious how caring you are as a person wanting to reach out and touch peoples lives or make a different in our sometimes screwed up society. I think its wonderful that you wrote about this. i only have one criticism, some of the lines, especially these two that i picked out...

    that the girl who was murdered will never be a wife

    some people dont even have a dime

    dont really fit into the stanza very well. you could try rephrasing them? i love the sentence in itself but perhaps they are a little too long for the stanza? i thought it just interupted the flow a little

    but other than that girlie i thought this was fantastic

    =]

    Geo

  • 17 years ago

    by xxSnow Angelxx

    Wow!..The poem was beautifully penned..and you've portrayed the meaning in depth in an absolutely great way..
    The way you started the poem was catchy and the topic you chose to write was indeed interesting
    Superb write..5/5

    xxPoojaxx

  • 17 years ago

    by Black Princess

    Yeah awesome poem well done, i enjoyed it alot :) just want to point out some tiny tiny things that possably could make it flow jst a little better in one area.

    [I believe strongly]
    'needs to be made a little longer it breaks the flow' so maybe
    "I believe with every piece of me"
    that everyone has their reason for being here
    and to add to my problem
    i feel I am no more then what appears.

    [[I want to make a change
    to a person a family>>,<< a friend
    maybe some day my feelings
    will become a popular trend.]]
    also breaking apart the family and friend thing.. but its just a suggestion.

    Well done in all very well written and much enjoyed :) thanks for sharing.
    5/5

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