Wondering how to live

Sitting in a chair
waiting for the world
to show me something that has changed
wondering
how i got here
where i am so alone
can not find anywhere
i can go

wondering
how i let my self fall behind
all the ones who are moving on
left me here
left me in my own tears
i do not know what i am to do
where i am to go

i am afraid of looking up
to see what the world
has to show
before my eyes
knowing i can not be held up
by others in this time
yet i feel so weak
not able to walk on my own feet
wishing i had some one
here beside me
to help me up

sitting here
wondering
where all
my friends have gone
when did they all get tired
and leave
what did i do
to cause them to flee
did i try to much
trying to cling on them
to walk me to
and through the door

i am afraid of being here alone
i am afraid of taking the step
with out knowing where
i will go
wondering how i became this
mess
left in a wreck
of my own life
left here only to live then to die
never to succeed in anything

wondering
how i can turn this life around
maybe catch up
right behind
the ones
who left me on the ground
walking with them into the future
no longer being caught in
the past
that first caused me to crash

sitting here
wondering how to live from here on
by myself
not with the help of anyone else