Hmm...this is a little bit morbid...but so am i...:)
*thinking about if i ought to scare other people with my morbid being*
*decides not to and thinks about a nicer thing to say*
the poem is pretty good, maybe you ought to divide it into several stanzas for an easier read...(small sugestion)
otherwise, it's great
(sorry for the small talk...i sometimes don't think very clearly...:D)
keep going
*isabel*