Untitled

by Loved In Hell   Jun 16, 2007


I see her there all alone crying screaming
feeling a pain no one else will ever know.
Running, hiding, from a darkness that haunts her. Fantasy overtakes her mind,
nightmares haunt her soul
and I stand unsure of what to do
I question whether to go to her or not,
but I conquer the fear rising in my throat
and make my way to her. Her hair covers her face, covered in filth, skin torn, bruised, burned,
her clothes in rags. She looks up at me pain filled tears broken eyes, lips cracked and bleeding
just as her life. I take her burnt hand and
gently lead her on a path.
She follows no questions asked.
We arrive and I point my finger
to a small stream. She runs in and quenches
her thirst. I help her wash her skin,
rid her of all her filth, her past.
She slowly washes her face.
I leave for a moment and return.
Her face glowing she radiates light
as the moon reflects the sun.
Silver beams show through her eyes.
I focus closely. A shiver runs down my spine
and the hair on my nape rises.
My eyes swallow the scene as I realize
this poor wretched girl is me.
My hand reaches out. As she does the same
a bolt of electricity runs through my fingers as they touch, hers and mine,
A flash of light and then I wake

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by Nix

    Wow this poem is fantastic, you created amazing atmosphere. It is very dark and the end is effective. I like th wording the most.
    Running, hiding, from a darkness that haunts her. Fantasy overtakes her mind,- this is my favorite line.
    Superb poem with excellent imagery, 5/5

  • 17 years ago

    by NyellMoonlight

    Greatly written dark poem, with haunting imagery.
    I think you should write it in stanzas, it would leave better impression, but the poem is good, anyway.
    Well done, 5/5

  • 17 years ago

    by Soraya Lowe

    Ooo! I like! I like very much! Very pretty! Very interesting...5/5 Great job!

  • 17 years ago

    by Robert

    I was not sure how to react to this poem it had some wonderful images in it and I found myself wanting to take in all, but I can't place my finger on it except to say something was missing and I don't know what Plot121

  • 17 years ago

    by deathdealer

    Break it up into stanzas, otherwise it will sound like a blog entry or a story

    but its good though =)

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