Our Kingdom

by xBrokenxAngelx   Jun 18, 2007


They seek revenge
for there avenge

upon there darkest hour

As they suffer for the pain it runs us through
can you really tell who?

but let the kingdom fall,
and just lose it all?

The kingdom
we created....

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  • 17 years ago

    by Richard Machado

    I felt that it can have a book writen on what's missing in that ending. I was left wanting more, more of what it was saying. Work on it a little more to get to a point, or even a stronger point of view to let me know where your going with it. Other than that and a few spelling/grammer mistakes (there to their) you can do alot better, but it is still good.

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