Oh, wow, girl. You have talent.
First off, check your computer; your apostrophes aren't showing up correctly; view your poem, you'll see what I mean.

And now.
Wow, sweetie.
If you are just beginning, this is utterly amazing.
I actually think that if it had rhymed it would have taken away from the meaning; great job with the use of words.

The flow seemed a bit off, but it happens.
And I read this more as a story or prose, but I still really, really enjoyed it.

I usually pick out my favorite line in a poem, but the way this was written, I loved it all because it all just worked off one another.
Great, great job.

xTheEcstasyofSuicidex 5.5