A Monday Afternoon

Thinking,wondering
I lay on the grass
and the memories start to flow on back.
pale skin,
burning in the sun.
the water of flowers
weighing them down.
a tear drips down
past my chin,
crying because this life i live
i am unable to win.
a tulip sprouts
up & out of the ground.
[i see] happieness
[but i feel it not] is nowhere to be found.
&&& you can look down the street.
and through the next town.
you can even look to my past
but never will you find how it all went down.
The whole truth
could be known by only one person,
but she too was unaware
that the hidden secret could indeed worsen.
and...everything stops!
just for that moment
the sun stops shinning
and the water on the flower stopped drowning.
my pale skin, now red and hot
burns memories with all the shock
now left alone to heal
I question: how do you heal, when everything you thought to be true,
turns out to be unreal?

copyrighted JENNAY 4.30.07