I like it.. adnother good one bravo:) And seeign how I kno w the story too it makes even more sense.

Beck

Omg.. that is so sick and sad :'( .. i could never call this poem good because of the story but I could call it well written... which it is

Keenan I truely did find this interesting although It felt more as if i was reading the story put into your own words then a poem and I know that is what you were going for but still something about it kind of through me off. The story portrayed behind it was good though I did like that part I think it may of lacked a little emotion in some areads but the emotion that this piece did hold was strong and meaningful. The link at the bottom was a good idea and the structure,grammer, spelling and form was all neat and effective. None the less well done on writing this it was quite interesting. ~mel

I really like how u turned this into a poem...makes it seem more real...as bad as that sounds...

anyways good job

Ashleigh

I absolutely love the description.
the flow got a little cliched, but it didn't make the poem suffer.

Awesome Job Keenan.
--Elly.