by Liz Jun 25, 2007
category :
Life, society /
about society
People say be happy |
by Mezmeryz
I always give honest opinions anyway =] so, your poem has a main theme, ur flow is fine, however you seem to go of the focus at some point and it kinda loses the point, if you get what i mean. it would help if you added one more stanza in the middle, focusing exactly or more strongly on the main topic, or improved on of the other stanzas. it would be sufficient enough, to transform this poem in to a masterpiece, because i really admire poems on life, which give messages on equality, and i really enjoyed reading this poem, aswell as approved with the topic. |