The reminder

by Solus   Jun 29, 2007


Hopeless, I floundered in dark places.
Wounded, I cried wrapped in barbed laces.
Hiding, you said that you have felt pain.
Pity, for you the heart awoke from were it had lain.
Love, you promised if I'd just stay.
Warmth, cold left because of your caring way.
Lies, but you never really cared.
Pain, this lesson you did share.
Used, forgotten I wandered back.
Evil, your feelings I do lack.
Sadness, I'm sliding faster into night.
Darkness, you said for me this is right.
Alone, dead as I always was.
Shadows, killing me is what this reminder does.

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by XxLastHopexX

    Wow...that all i can say

  • 17 years ago

    by NyellMoonlight

    This piece has great rhythm and very captivating atmosphere. You described your feelings in a great way and portrayed truly powerful images with emotions through the poem.
    Excellently done.

  • 17 years ago

    by sara

    Great work 5/5

  • 17 years ago

    by Serina the Squid

    The poem doesnt seem to flow very smoothly and at first you think it's just bad rhythm, but then the last line hits very nicely and pulls the whole thing together, giving the slightly choppy refrain home and solace. amazing how one line can make something would-be mediocre into a masterpiece.

  • 17 years ago

    by Espoirfailed

    Hey, i'm really sorry, you've commented quite a few of my poems and i don't know if i've ever returned the favour, but anyway...
    this poem... WOW! i loved how you started each line with a single word- ok that sounds obvious but you know what i mean.
    the rhyme was kindof cliche, but it worked. and it worked well.
    it was beautifully sad/haunting.
    great read/write