Fire

Interesting to say the least.

I like this piece it gave me the feeling of a relationship starting from just a single spark of probably lust or some relationship which involved a guy which you believed to stand out of the crowd maybe a first love lost cause the embers are always there and all it woul d take to reignite the flames would be a spark..

i'm not sure if this is the purpose but thats all i got i'm afraid.. Though the poems itself was well written :)

A flash
burning, & breathing
different from streaks in sky
this is strange
it does not disappear easily

^^ very good imagine and very nicely writen. not a bad way of opening your poem here.

bright
warm and peaceful
it does not light up whole land
blackens earth
it is warmer the closer i get

^^ hmm.. the flow was off here and idk just sumthing else was missing here. it didnt touch me like i would want it too.

gone
strange and wonderful
it has ceased to flicker in the night
yet now
i still feel it when he is near

F
I
R
E

^^ whatcha feel wen he is near i can relate i can realte cuz i feel like that n nervous n cool at the same time wen mi chicko is near me.

yes i remember now
a great fire when i look at him
i feel strange, small
i want to hide inside myself

^^ aww.. this was cute. i liked it. i for one i feel smaller wen am next to him but protective.

fire
it is not gone
even though it burned out
i can still feel it inside myself
but then
not all fire is created through sticks

all it takes is a spark

^^ omg i do like how you ended your piece here. nicely done.
4/5 for me

TaKe CaRe,
Frenchy

I liked this piece simply for the accomplishment of imagery. While i think you could still revise some words for better effect, I could see and almost feel the fire you spoke of in this poem.

This poem was pretty good. Yeah, it was a bit rough, because there was no real rhythm. But, at least you say what is on your mind when it comes to poetry. I love the whole title of "Fire" and then at the end you kind of use that title more.. which was very neat and creative. :) I think you did a nice job here, but if I were you.. I'd just stick with the rhyming. Your rhyming poems are not terrible at all. Maybe that's your thing. At least I think it is. I'm nto saying non-rhyming poems are bad or anything, they aren't. I love writing them. It comes to me easier and I let out sooo much that I'm feeling. We all have our strengths in poetry, and I think yo'ud do amazing with the continuing of rhyming poetry... That's just a opinion. I don't really care for this non-rhyming poetry of yours.. becaues it doesn't have that flow that rhyming poetry does. Up to you completely, I'm just giving you my thoughts. :) All in all, a great poem with a wonderful title that you used almost perfectly throughout the entire poem. Great work. Keep improving. 5/5.

I love the last line, but i really liked the poem too. Nice job=)