Id say months back,
When it ended
That was the time I was hurt the most.
And in September throughout December
I thanked god that you weren't there to see me like that.
And Id always think of you.
No matter where I was.
And I still waited for you.
Just to see if you'd show up.
Still months had passed, and keep passing.
And I somehow still think of you.
Like a bitter sweet memory of a long time ago
With nothing left, but a few letters that I wrote.
That still today, I keep in a box in my dresser
And every now and then I open them.
And even today it still hurts me.
Its strange to think the songs we used to sing
That back then, when it was over, I could never listen to them.
All the ones you had dedicated to me
Like The World By Brad Paisley
And although it was sweet
I have gotten over that.
And I can listen to them now without crying as much
But it still breaks my heart
Just to hear that certain one.
Because you were my world
And everything in it
And when I had lost you
It felt like the world had stopped spinning.
But I held onto the ends and put them together
And I put them in that box
With all those lost love letters.
And in the voice of a singer to let me know that it was nothing
To remind me they were just words
To keep me from running.
Do you remember that poem
I wrote you back in like August...
It was four pages long and it took me forever to write it
A Million Memories was the name
And a million memories I had claimed, with you
I gave it to you at your house and we both cried on your couch
Because we new it was true
At least the whole part of me loving you
But you didn't.
And I knew that, and it was fine.
We had broken up like already 3 times
And after that, 3 more had come.
But it was you though, every time
You would always break up with me
I think that hurt more
And I wish I had set you free...
Looking back on it, I couldn't tell you every reason why
Or the exact dates
I know the last one was in October.
Because that was when I had finally walked away.
With a million memories in my mind
I sometimes wish I hadn't turned away
And I sometimes wish that I had loved you
Even sometimes till this day.
To look back on it now,
Its hard to say
Why I ever felt that way.
Ive been through heartbreaks before
So why does this one hurt so much?
That feeling of love that I crave,
That until now I don't.
That feeling of pain that I save,
That leaves me to choke.
So I realize that the reason is him,
But reasons like seasons,
They constantly change.
But a good one at that
Hes the only one who's got a knife for me to stab me in my back.
And I'm glad that he did.
So watch me strike a match,
On all my wasted time
Ill finally put your picture down,
And hopefully get some sleep tonight.
Id say months back,
When it ended
That was the time I was hurt the most.
