Locked Box

I have these bad memories; bad memories and pain,
tucked in their own locked box; far from my mind,
when the door unlocks itself; dangers stir around,
my nightmares awaken from their monthly slumber,
the feeling of his hands on my skin; sickening me again,
his lips touch my skin again; I'm disgusted with myself.
I get the box to lock once more; scared of re-opening,
hoping it doesn't open up today again; praying it stays closed,
the box is opening again; the pain is coming I feel it,
the memories are opening that doorway; doorway to my weakness,
I'm falling to the ground again; feeling dirty and gulity again,
the box has finally closed for the night; so I thought,
nightmares are raging for hours; sleeping is my misery,
death screams and tears pouring down; pain is my master,
this locked box is deep in my mind; I closed it again today,
it's locked for a while anyway; may it stay closed for all eternity,
I'm laying down the past; for my future to be awakened,
this locked box may open; yet it won't get the best of me anymore.