Wanting my addiction

I wish i had a cigarette
i wish i had a boyfriend
sum one to love me
and hold me at night
but today i will just be alone
no ones even in sight
none to hold my hand
or cut my wrist when I'm feeling bad
none to feel my pain
or say i love you and
wishing i could do the same
i want to say i love you
but don't know how to start
to tell you i gave you my heart
and everything thats
held within it
my love
my hope
my memories
my thoughts are all held within my heart and everything thats within me
you now hold.