Confessions of a Knight

© Francisco Guzman 2007

I have walked a sinful road and I don't know when my last breath will be,
So I hope to use it for forgiveness and ask that you finally set me free
In my weakness I lost faith and I'm not sure who'll be the last person I see,
So I take this time to hold on stronger and ask that you never leave

The voices that once inspired me to go on
Have now silenced and put themselves to sleep
The confidence I once relied on to keep me strong
Has slowly diminished and proclaimed its sole defeat
Like a candle that evades its unruly end in company of rain
I am unsure of how much longer my faith can continue in vain
The shred of dignity that once served as the oil to keep my flame alit
Has now reached the last of its reserves

I've fallen so many times, led myself to believe so many lies
Reluctant to trust anything that mirrored the remedy I needed inside
So tired of defending my life, protecting my eyes
From a truth that always stood before me, one I can no longer hide

I've lost my way and I need a hand to guide me until the darkness leaves
I'm caught in a maze with no sense of where to go or what to believe
I want to escape, but I can't find the path,
Feels like I've been scorned by destiny's wrath
And so an exit seems impossible, for sorrow seems to enjoy my company

The pressure starts to build as my armor begins to dismantle
In the presence of the doubt and fear that surround me
I'm losing control of my own self will as confusion renders
Itself in thick fog that threatens to compromise my clarity
How I wish I had a hand to hold...

But as a knight I must stand my ground and
Never allow my mind to defeat the fighter I house inside

For I now know I must fall in order to stand
stronger than I ever have before
I'll put all my qualms and disbeliefs to rest,
for this champion has found a way to soar
As a knight I began this journey,
As a soldier the struggle I will uphold
No longer do these chains hold me back,
the entire story is about to unfold

Only one victor shall be proclaimed,
and it is I who after that title will be named