What

Anger amazes me.
Am I really too blind too see,
That everything that feels so right,
Is really so wrong tonight?
I don't know what I should do,
Why is it that I am sad and blue?
Should I cry the tears that I hold in?
Should I just pretend,
That everything is as it should be?
That I am really free,
Or should I just let my spirit fly,
Praying to God to just let me die,
And rid me of all this pain.
I am sick of crying in the rain,
And yelling in the rising wind.
These demons that live so deep within,
Unmerciful, and unforgiving,
Am I existing or am I living?
The answers I do not know,
They are hidden in my dark dead soul.
Sitting in the dark, while others are sleeping,
Are my secrets really worth keeping?
Or should I just let everyone see,
All the things that have happened to me.
Fake smiles, and joyous voice,
No one knows of my choice,
But I think that it is time I said good-bye.
For this is the night I have picked to die.
The thin red lines are flowing dark,
I am letting the demons go from my heart,
As my blood splatters on the carpeted floor,
I just don't have the will to live anymore.
All the yelling and all the fighting,
All the paper that I waste with my writing,
The tears that I have shed that are unseen.
This will be the end to everything.
A way out of all the memories that haunt,
All the faces that taunt,
And all the shit that I can't get passed,
This was the life that wasn't meant to last.