Without you

At first it was your face
seemingly perfect
haunting my dreams
then it was your name
so truly beautiful
thats how it seems
then it was your voice
enough to make me cry
trying to ignore it
but it was something i couldn't deny
it was the words you used
and how they were spelled
the messages you sent
telling me how you felt
the lies that i knew
but tried to ignore
just to keep myself content
it was less then i could be sure
the times you ignored me
and the looks you gave
driving me crazy
but i had to be brave
realizing what you were like
and what you could do
i tried to be better
but it was a stage i couldn't bring myself through
you brought me to tears
more then just one time
you gave me more fears
it wasn't all just fine
there was something about your expression
a specialty of your look
something so addictive
its hurt everything it took
something moving about your name
like everyone knows it
though I've never heard it
it's driving me insane
the words that come from your mouth
killing me inside
trying to ignore them
but there's no where left to hide
awful things that bring me to tears
trying to avoid the thoughts
that these have become my biggest fears
loving you brought so much pain
chasing and running, hiding when i got scared
all those times i stood out in the rain
and after this happened
leaving me with uncovered lies
devastating truths
and uncalled for tries
i tried my best
to keep myself protected
but doing this made it worse
cos i was still the one affected
i made it a little less easy
and this got you worked up
you just got a little more angry
and it turned out to be anything but
the pain was overwhelming
but eventually it fades
being away from you
will make it better
finally my heart can re mend itself
and maybe one day i won't think of you
someone else will take that place
only this time it will be true
i can't believe the feeling
you get from just three words
you were never worth it
and though I'll never achieve
knowing this for sure
and not that i can help
but wonder if i had done something differently before
but you gave me one thing
to use for closure
you were so awful
no matter how addictive you are
thats not my type
crying over you
has become my past
getting over you
will be my present
and my future
is going to be without you