Insanity Song

by dollwithafrown   Aug 1, 2007


It used to be a lullaby;
Your sweet echoes filled my ears.
Yet now all that voice does to me
Is flood my memory with my darkest fears.

Your singing soothed me while I could not sleep;
It calmed me when my worries rose,
Yet now it is a mere reflection
Of that gentle man whom I once chose.

Yet you turned so dark, so bitter;
A constant cloud above your head.
It became so bad that I found I cared not
If you one day ended up stone-cold dead.

My mind is now so frazzled, so ruined,
And that lullaby of which I've known all along
Is nothing more than a harsh memory,
Of which I now know as my "Insanity Song".

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by Synh

    The last line in the first stanza threw off the flow a bit but not much.

    In the third stanza, I think it would flow better if you didn't start the line with 'Yet' because you had just used it in the last stanza. And the last line in the third stanza threw the flow off again.

    Nice concept but I have to say that, again, I didn't like it. It seemed force and sounded like you only wrote this for a contest or for something else. The flow was awkward and the last line of the poem seemed way forced.

  • 17 years ago

    by HOLLYWOODxBANGBANG

    A perfect poem for a teenage girl going through a break-up. :] Thanks, I needed to read that. Pfft. Boys, who needs `em right? Lol, you did a great job on this poem, I really enjoyed reading this. :]

    5.5

  • 17 years ago

    by CompletelyIncomplete

    Very beautiful and I loved the structure,, the oem is cohesive all the way :)

  • 17 years ago

    by Jess

    I like the contrast between the lullaby and the song it has now become thru ur description in every stanza well done

  • 17 years ago

    by Marc Ortiz

    That was wonderful =) The title is really good - It stands out ^_^ Excellent vocab, it flowed well too, well done.

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