There is a hole.
When I was young.
I bypassed it, I walked around it
As I grew older.
I got curious.
And walked closer to it.
Peering down, I saw nothingness.
Darkness.
Temptation got the best of me
And I stepped into the hole.
Nothing changed.
I thought.
But the older I grew
And the longer I stayed in that hole.
I realised I was sinking.
Deeper. Faster. Faster. Deeper.
And I could feel myself changing.
Becoming something else. Someone else.
I didn't like this.
And I realised, I had to get out.
I had to climb out.
Or I would be swallowed whole.
Becoming nothingness as well.
When I grabbed onto the earth to pull myself out
I wasn't strong enough.
I couldn't pull myself up.
And the ground kept sinking away beneath my feet
Until I was just hanging there.
Tired. Cold. Alone.
Surrounded by nothing but darkness
And the little light that shone above me
Was slowly fading away.
And people walked passed me
Just staring. Pointing. Some laughing.
They hurt me more than the pain I was beginning to feel
Surging through my limbs.
As the blood was rushing through my veins to my head
I was embarrassed. Ashamed. I felt my heart shatter
And watched the pieces as they faded into the darkness.
And believe they stepped on me.
Walked over me.
These people, so cruel
Pushing me down.
But I couldn't let go.
I had to hang on.
But I could feel my fingers slipping.
One by one, they would fail.
And I would fall.
And no one would care really.
Maybe I wouldn't either?
Before I could slip any farther
The earth began to give way
I had to do something
But there wasn't anything I could do
I just had to watch
As my world gave way
As the light above me got farther and farther away.
I was falling so fast
I never thought I would stop
Until a hand
A simple hand.
Reached for me and pulled me from the darkness
So strong.
And I felt love. Warmth. Happiness
Instantly I fell in love
But I realised
I was falling again.
The warmth was gone. The light had faded. The love... oh the love.
And it was dark, and I was falling.
In that goddamn hole again.
I let myself get enveloped in it again.
Tricked.
Over and over again.
I end up in the same treacherous place.
In all my searching.
Looking for the way out.
I have come to realise
What this life is about
Its about hanging on
When your heart can't take anymore
Its about giving more
When you feel like giving up
And learning.
Its about learning. Loving. Accepting.
And letting go.
And if I ever get out.
If I ever learn my lesson.
Maybe one day, I'll be able to look at this hole.
And smile for the memories.
Say goodbye.
And walk around it once again.
