Reflection Of What I've Become

I close my eyes
And imagine you're not there
Imagine my mistakes, but awake
They won't disappear

I don't know why I'm mad
I made the choice alone
I wish I could forget and work it out,
But they remain, no matter how much I've grown

I close my eyes
And dream of a peaceful place
No fights, lies, or pain
But dreaming seems like a waste

I don't know why I'm so angry
Cause the pain I know won't just go away
I still have to face the consequences
Still say all the things I need to say

I close my eyes
And picture my words of regret
No matter how many times I apologize
I'll ever want what I get

I don't know why I'm so sad
You probably feel worse
But the pain inside me I can't describe
I think that I am cursed

I close my eyes
And think what if I chose the other path
How different would I be now?
Could I ever truly laugh?

I don't know why I can still feel
Because my emotions have gone numb
But all the pain you see on the outside
Is the reflection of what I've become