Really great poem
5/5

I think this poem is good but it kinda confused me... =/ hmm.... not sure...but the beginning is great.

This is a really great poem, in a sadistic kind of way.... And the intensity expressed here is really amazing.. I like the way you put it into a story... Very creative..

Sounds a lot like something out of a horror movie! It's perfect! 5/5

It does remind me of a horror movie. :]
my favorite part was the ending part talking about him struggling to get out of his striaght jacket, a definate twist and i lovedddd it :]

A creepy story indeed. Liked the sentence: "Zzzing in the tent". A nice job, better than the other two I commented. 5/5

Wow. very interesting. loved this poem...... great job!!!!!

mandy

Wow...Really liked it! I loved how instead of using all this information in long sentances you shortened it up it made the story more intense. I loved the last line as well your a great writer keep it up
5/5
kaila

Wow what a lovely poem. Lovely and provoking. I love this one. It is cohesive and coherent :) 5/5

Okay, the imagery in this poem is AMAZING. Striking and vivid and at times somewhat creepy, although I guess that's the point haha.

I enjoyed this, it was original and unique in concept and kept me interested throughout.

Flow could be somewhat better in a couple places, but other than that this was perfect.

Again, your imagery is amazing

It was very thought provoking.

I liked this piece, it was quite interesting.

Wow, this was wonderful. I could feel the emotions buried in the words. It read nicely and I loved the way that you worded everything. You have a lot of talent, I didn't even see how it was going to end until I read it.

Keep the pen to the paper *5/5*

This poem sent chills down my spine...im not sure what made you write this but it was well written. Great job

Wonderful write
I loved the vocabulary
and you kept my attention from start to end
I really enjoyed the flow
it always seemed to be right on
keep it up
5/5
kaila

Lol wicked poem

Great poem,just a little confusing to me,if u get the chance please pm me & explain it,but awsome poem!

So dark. It gave me the chills.

Amazing imagery! I loved the way you describe it. Amazing write! 5.5

Zzzing in the tent...

^ You should probably just write sleeping. =]

It was a good poem.. However, if you do wanna make your poetry any better.. Try and minimise on using any of the words 'i, me, you, her, and, the, etc' Trust me, it will sound so much better..

I liked your word vocab though, made it alot more interesting. and your flow was nice, and not out of proportion. =]

Keep it up.

I like it alot 5/5... the last line seems a little confusing cause its saying put this off.. when im sure you mean take this off.

-Syn

O.O Wow. Creepy. I loved it. At first it really didn't capture me. Honestly it didn't, but in the middle and the end I was like wow. It was just so vivid and real. And I loved the fact that u made it seem like u were talking and telling some1. That was really neat. 5/5

-->Rach<--