I have tried to let go of this past I created.
But somehow I have become the person I hated.
I tried to rid myself of my own fears,
But eventually they grew with coming years.
The soul I had as a child was lost,
And deciding to die was the final cost.
How can I live when there is no hope?
I have tried so hard to learn and cope.
Back then I thought there was no other way
Except to say goodbye on that final day.
'Sticking it out' for four years or so,
If I only knew then what I now know.
I would toughen up for just another year,
Maybe that voice would disappear.
You know, the one whispering all the time
Saying killing yourself isnt too big a crime.
The little voice that drives you to your fate
Even though you know it was you to create.
I just want to tell you, I really tried,
With pain, and tears, oh how I cried.
I pushed through until I was 17 years old,
But that is when my life began to unfold.
Or should I say death, because thats where it did end.
That day when my life was no longer my friend.
And now looking down from heaven above,
I wish I had just a little more love.
Instead of looking up above to the sky,
I looked to the ground to fall and die.
