I want a love like me thinking of you thinking of me thinking of you type love or me telling my friends more than I have ever admitted to myself about how I feel about you type love or hating how jealous you are but loving how much you want me all to yourself type love or seeing how your first name just sounds so good next to my last name. and shit- I wanted to see how far I could get without calling you and I barely made it out of my garage. See, I want a love that makes me wait until she falls asleep then wonder if she’s dreaming about us being in love type love or who loves the other more or what she’s doing at this exact moment or slow dancing in the middle of our apartment to the music of our hearts. Closing my eyes and imagining how a love so good could just hurt so much when she’s not there and shit I love not knowing where this love is headed type love. And check this- I want to place those little post-it notes all around the house so she never forgets how much I love her type love then not have enough ink in my pen to write all the love type love and hope I make her feel as good as she makes me feel type love and (I want her to distract me from whatever I'm doing type love) and just like in high school I want to spend hours on the phone not saying shit and then fall asleep and then wake up with her right next to me and smell her all up in my covers type love and I want to deal with my friends making fun of me the way I made fun of them when they went through the same kind of love type love. The only difference is this is one of those real type loves I want to try counting the ways I love her then lose count in the middle just so I could start all over again (I want to breakdown the time we spend into seconds just so it sounds like we spend more time together type love) (and also like in high school) I want to celebrate one of those one-month anniversaries even though they isn’t really anniversaries but doing it just ‘cause it makes her happy type love and I want to fall in love with the melody the phone plays when her number's dial into it then talk to you until I lose my breath, she leaves me breathless, but with the expanding of my lungs I inhale all of her back into me. I want a love that makes me need to change my cell phone calling plan to something that allows me to talk to her longer ‘cause in all honesty, I want to avoid one of them high cell phone bill type loves and I want a love that makes me regret how small my hands are I mean the lines on my palms don’t give me enough time to love you as long as I’d like to type love and I want a love that makes me st-st-st-stutter just thinking about how strong this love is type love and I want a love that makes me want to cut off all my hair... Well maybe not all of the hair, maybe like I’d cut the split ends and trim the mustache but it would still be a symbol of how strong my love is for her. I kind of feel comfortable now so I can tell you this I even be fantasizing about walking out on a green light just dying to get hit by a car just so I could lose my memory, get transported to some third world country just to get treated and somehow meet up again with you so I could fall in love with you in a different language and see if it still feels the same type love. I want a love that’s as unexplainable as she is And I'm married(that's the biggest clue, I'm married he's not) and she's the one I share this love with
forget it. one day she will realize I’m everything she ever wanted but ill have already seen that shes something i never needed
