With this paper and pen

With this paper and this pen
I'll write down how i feel
you'll be the only ones that know
that my smiles are never real

i don't write suicide notes
cause there all stored in my head
if someone doesn't do something soon
you'll all wake up and find me dead

this knife is the only thing
that makes me feel alive
but when i put it down
i feel so dead inside

Pain doesn't hurt
if it's all you've ever felt
they think I'm doing fine
but I'm about to kill myself