Absentee

by Lonely Little Dreamer   Sep 11, 2007


Like a mime slowly going through the motions of life,
Doing everything that he thinks is right.
Just being there for your flesh and blood,
But harboring thoughts of lust and love.

Leaving loving arms, you turn away;
Finding new arms of passion sin.
Once a wife, now a widow you have made,
She leaves; you return to a bed full of games.

Harlequin women soon tires from the play,
Leaving you for fresh meat to prey.
Returning back to the life you once had.
Hoping that you could still play the role of dad.

A little girl, a shell you find.
Forced to become an adult before her time.
Blankly she stares, she soon approaches you;
And with a smile, she walks right through you.

For a father who was never around,
You have become nothing, a mere sliver of air.
So blow away and never return,
For she cannot miss what was never there.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Ashleigh Skye

    Wow this was really deep when I read it the first time I thought that it was simply doing going to be about the death of a father or mother but at the end it turns out to be about an absent father, which in some cases can be even worse. I really liked how you didn't mention the real meaning of this poem until the very end, I also really liked the word choices. The only thing that I can see to improve upon if I were you is I would use less words like you and I. I really loved the metaphores that you described however. They were very unique and brought a freshness to the poem that isn't seen very often. I think that my favorite stanza would have to be the forth one. For it shows the troubles that can happen when parrents aren't aroud for their children. And the last line brings a good solid close to the poem. Nice work

  • 17 years ago

    by UnToLd TrUtH

    Very sad poem. I loved the way you had different people represent different situations. This had a lot of powerfull imaginary. 5/5

  • 17 years ago

    by Brittany

    You're an amazing writer.
    Creative, the imagery was clear and brilliant.
    You definitely stirred emotions in me.
    Your flow was flawless, and you have a great gift.

  • 17 years ago

    by Bryan

    This is so sad, know exactly how you feel, the last stanza was VERY good, loved it, again flawless flow and grammer, i give it a 5/5!!!

  • 17 years ago

    by krystal

    Amazing 5/5

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