This was an excellent poem. It was elegantly mature; I loved the twisting of the feeling of security, it was quite intruiging (It might just be me who got this feeling :P) Anywhoo, the overall design of the poem plucked all the right strings in my own memories. I, simply, could identify with the poem, and I think it's purely beautiful, and would be flawless if it wasn't for the flow of the 8th line. |
by Cella Bella
What a beautiful piece of poetry. The repetition of the first line was very powerful and brilliant. It made the piece more meaningful and wasn't overbearing. The flow was wonderful as well. 5/5 |
by Nix
Incredible poem, metaphors are great and it is very unique. You created superb atmosphere and every line is filed with emotions. I don't prefer love poetry but this one is amazing! Well done! I really enjoy in it. |
by Shauna
Amazing Poem!! Brilliant written and creative.. I really enjoyed reading this.. and very good flow as well! Great Poem! |
Wow this is the best metaphor I have read in a love poem for quite a while. It seems to reflect the reality that the beauty of romance is usually brief indeed |
by Jenna
This is SOOOOOOOOO AMAZING! the words were perfect and the flow was perfect to! the emotions ugh...all i can say is AMAZING! its beautiful! |
Excellent rhyming. I loved how you repeated the first line. It really puts enphasis on it. Plus it's an awesome line/title. 5. |
This a very creative and beautiful piece. I loved the flow of the poem. The repitition of the first line in each verse, it created a sense of perfection as well as complition. 5/5 |
by Veamm
Excellent! |
by Marc Ortiz
Oh wow.. another beautifully penned written piece by you. I really love the use of repetition in this poem, the flow was flawless. And again your word choice is amazing. |
Well done, just amazing. The flow the idea. You have used language in all of your poems that is just so strong. You express your emotion in such a talented way. Great Job! |
by ANDRE AQUINO
I like this one, it is really greatly written and deep. 5/5 for you keep up... |
by Lisa
Good flow, amazing poem. I loved it. Great job. |
...death...lament.....and butterfly, i love how you threw that contrast in there...this was an incredible piece, you have amazing form and your word choice was killer, great job on this! |
What a superb piece of art. The repetition of the first line kept the piece strong and interesting -- really held a nice structure. Your vocabulary was, again, great, and the idea is executed wonderfully. |
by Megann Lee
Oh wow! I love this poem. Your wording you used was so so strong and the flow and repeativity (SP?) of " |
by Goran Rahim
This was a great poem written so greatly. |
by Melpomene
Lament of a dying butterfly -- even the best shall fall; |
Such a beautiful poem... enjoyed every stanza, every word, every letter lol 5/5 keep it up |
by Stephanie
I love this. It was absolutely amazing. |