All I have to offer you is I am so sorry

I said I am so sorry but you don't believe me and yet that is all I have to give to you because I know other word to say to you how sorry i am for hurting you and breaking your trust and i want to be with you but it hurts because you hate me so and what do I do I have so say good bye and lose you forever and then look back in a couple of years and know that i made the worse mistake to lose you but i fear that it will be the only way for you to forgive me and all i want to do is make all your hurt go away for all the things i did against you and it kills me to turn my back on you but you have to see that it might be the only way to make the hurt go away and i don't know what else i can do to make you smile again because your smile is the greatest joy i know and yet i am the one who made it go away so now what do i do