I can only smile on the outside for every wish I make becomes the opposite
My friends thinking that I'm so happy yet misery is my friend
Only wanting to love and be loved by someone who understands me
Should it point at my heart because my Heart ache becomes more painful every day
Or should I point it towards my head because my head so full of regrets, what ifs and unbearable thoughts which consume me every day
I try to be the best person I can, everyday, I make the people around me smile before I do
But it doesn't help fill the void, the space that's left, the one that no one wants to fill
This emptiness I hold can't be filled by my friends, It needs more
My hands are shaking my fingers are sweating my tears fall again maybe for one last time
My biggest fear of all has become my reality and my reality is what I've always feared
I can not grasp this feeling of loneliness, my pain is so agonizing
Do I dare do this will anyone actually care I know there are a some but maybe they'll understand, why I put this medicine to my pain in my hand
They may say it's the easy way out and to whom it will burden but they don't feel what's inside me, what's tearing my sole apart they don't see me cry to sleep or on the way to work ,in the shower or when I'm in line at a store
The out come of this will ease in time you all will exists with out me
I will be forgotten people don't remember ones like me I've done nothing for anyone
Sure I can make you smile but who's gunna make me smile
Why cant I just do this,,, I want it,,, I dream of it,,, am I scared,, I just need to be brave I have the tools and the time is here,,,,,,,,, all I have to do is just Do It,,,,,,,,,, Just pull the trigger,,,,,,,, JUST pull the TRIGGER,,,,,,, JUST PULL THE--------
