Knife in the back!

I pretend i dont care that you say the things you do
i shrug them away with a laugh and a smile
but what you dont realise is that when you speak
im inwardly crying all the while.

you have the nerve to call yourself my friend
then call me those names for all to hear
you say you dont mean it and that its just a joke
even when people walk past me and sneer

you've called me a wh**e and youve called me a s**t
when this isnt one bit true
you've branded me this for no reason at all
and now everyone's heard-thanks to you

and the things that make it so much worse
is when you run up and give me a hug
you say "i didn't mean it! are you mad at me?"
and i lamely return the gesture & shrug.

i cant seem to be able to stay mad with you
so accept your apology i do
but you stab me in the back every time
you drive that knife right through

So now the only time im ever at peace
is when i am home on my own
a sad thing to say, but it is the truth
that thanks to you, i trust me alone.