Comments : Why?

  • 17 years ago

    by NyellMoonlight

    Very effective and filled with emotions. I don't like the first stanza because the repetition of the "why when... " ruins the flow a bit, but the rest of this piece is very good. I like the comparisons in every stanza. My favorite one is:
    -Why don't I just fall?

    Fall down like a rock when it is
    Dropped into the ocean.-

    Keep up!