I reallyty love the beginning but the tempo has gone down in the latter part I loved the para

Can you explain where the joy
Went as it left your eyes
So it could be taken over
By all the painful lies

this speaks a lot

Try to add a uniformity

rest I wont say it was the best of the poems I would have readbut certainly its none less than 5/5

Keep it up

Good work

If you want me to criticize why it lacks than let me know

take care,
Roxiee