My darkest hour

You are my girlfriend
There are many others like you
But you are mine
True to you I will be
Even in our darkest hour

The nights I have spent just dreaming
The days so long and overwhelming
I kiss you every night in my mind
I touch your sandy toned skin with my hand
I whisper in your ear

I feel you breathe on my neck
I stroke every last piece of hair on your head, and I watch You sleep

Why cant I be with you
It is not fair
The sun is with the sky
Boats are with water
Trees are with soil

To be with you would make me a happy man
As these days I see to much
I see blood and tears
Murder and pain
Bullets and sand
Sand as far as the eye can see

Each night colder than the last it seems
Each breath bringing me closer to you
I wash down,
Knowing I will never be clean
I scrub
Sometimes till I bleed

I scream at myself
Disillusioned, confused and disgraced
Innocents killed
Brutal wounds on babies young.
From my hand I caused this
And i feel i have got you stuck in the crossfire

This is my rifle
There are many others like it
But this one is mine
True to it I will be
Even in this our darkest hour

Hatred of myself
As this is me now,
I should be with you.