Its an interesting poem. I liked the intergalactic metaphors and the references that linked them. The flow was ok but it was an interesting story. Overall it was a good write. Though i think since a lot of lines were long that P&Q messed up the structure, but the punctuation made up for it. Keep up the good work.

Omg, it was great, i don't know how someone could downvote you, i loved it completely, the way you put your words together i know i've said this but it works so well and you write it so beautifully. my fave stanza was the last one it was great. 5/5

If you whisper into my ear, with crisp lights between our cheeks, I'll want to shudder closer,
But the light burns brighter to say, "It's too dangerous! Now is your chance to flee."
The air's so clear, I can see your eyes through the burning particles;
I'll admit, "Holding on is what I'd like to do, but it just isn't for me."

amazing ^^^^

Okay...I love the metaphors you used in this. It adds for a very powerful effect on the whole piece.

Imagery, as always, was beautifully done. It creates very vivid pictures for the reader.

I loved the flow and word usage in this, it all fits together so perfectly.
I frikken adore the last line..so intense and hardhitting, with so much meaning and emotion packed into those few words.

Beautifully, and elegantly written.

I love the way you use repetition of some of your vocab in this poem. I like the way you have perfected the punctuationand the layout of this poem. Nice work xxx alex xxx

So filled with emotions and thoughts. I like this poem. If improved, would be great. Keep it up.

Now that was truly effin amazing
I was lost in the words that you chose so well
my imagtion was definalty pricked, that was deep, and powerful, I envy your talent. the flow was amazing. I could see no room for improvement, truly unique, and I truly enjoyable, keep up the good work 5/5 although you deserve better

If we live life, and think to live it twice., it might show its nice,,
so sue i side,. some times lied

That was a very deep poem
so full of emotion and it was so awesome
I really loved it
Now im gonna be waiting for my nine comments ^_^

". . . air taste free. . . . " tastes.
". . . (just encase)?. . . " Are you sure you mean that 'encase'. Or do you mean incase? Lol. I guess either would fit there okay, I'm just not sure which one you mean. . .

The stanza before the last one was only 3 lines, instead of 4. I thought that was kind off odd.

Overall, the poem is amazing. I loved the way it was made, and the flow of it was great.
I'm also quite fond of the way you can take such long words and make them work. I use them a lot, but rarely do I make them work. Lol.

Amazing job.

pee.ess. i'm sorry it took so long to get to these. :|
gah.
slow few weeks.

At first read through, I really disliked this poem. I liked the imagery, and that was it.

I wanted to make sure I understood the meaning, though, so I reread it more carefully. That time I really enjoyed it. The second to last stanza is definitely my favorite. Really gets your point out there, yet makes the people in the poem seem... alone? but as if they are meant to be that way. I'm not sure, but I liked it.

But the light burns brighter to say, "It's too dangerous! Now is your chance to flee."
The air's so clear, I can see your eyes through the burning particles;
I'll admit, "Holding on is what I'd like to do, but it just isn't for me."

Reminds me of something you once said to me when we were together, in less subtle words. So that really stuck out.
Otherwise.. I really like your new style. The form isnt so hot.. but who cares? It threw me off at first and didnt keep my attention.. but it got me into it again pretty soon. I like the imagery and the vocabulary. I liked that best. :]

p.s.. this has nothing to do with the 45 thing.

I really loved this piece I think it is one of your best. The description was well done and how you drew the reader in your work was very well done I gave you a 5 great piece Plot121

Okay i liked it a lot - good rhythm, very poetic ways of saying things, metaphors, etc - and i think its very eloquent, but some of the sentences are a bit long and complex, and the reference to nitrogen didnt come across as very poetic. still, the ideas and writing in general were really good, so ill give it a 5/5